Because Midnight in Paris is a delightful cliche of a French-American relations. And because French people define who they are by what they do outside of work and Americans define who they are by what they do at work. And because French people take food seriously and sex lightly while Americans take food lightly and sex seriously.

And because Woody Allen's Hemingway pour out unbeatable prose like;

"All men fear death. It's a natural fear that consumes us all. We fear death because we feel that we haven't loved well enough or loved at all, which ultimately are one and the same. However, when you make love with a truly great woman, one that deserves the utmost respect in this world and one that makes you feel truly powerful, that fear of death completely disappears. Because when you are sharing your body and heart with a great woman the world fades away. You two are the only ones in the entire universe. You conquer what most lesser men have never conquered before, you have conquered a great woman's heart, the most vulnerable thing she can offer to another. Death no longer lingers in the mind. Fear no longer clouds your heart. Only passion for living, and for loving, become your sole reality. This is no easy task for it takes insurmountable courage. But remember this, for that moment when you are making love with a woman of true greatness you will feel immortal. "

Possibly the most insightful/over-analytical rejection we've ever recieved.

Sunday, August 21, 2011, 02:45 am

Dear xxxxx. It makes me very, very sad that whatever mis-communication we've had has been received in a certain way. I think you are one of the most beautiful, interesting and intriguing people I've met. All I want to do is to have you for myself an kiss you in the shadows of the skyscrapers. I feel a rare connection when I look into your eyes, but maybe that is an illusion. Please let me know if I'm right or wrong. Silence will be translated in 'fuck off". X

Sunday, August 21, 2011, 01.23 pm

Xxxx --


You are a darling. Your honesty and "just do it" or "just say it" approach to life are remarkable. I really respect and appreciate these qualities in you. Your positivism is as well 'super awesome'.


Yes, I think there has been some miscommunication between the two of us. I did always feel something special (different might be a better word) with you. You are weird across the board though (even weirder than me I dare say; which is saying something) and so...I just took it as part of that weirdness. I'm not sure. I think (the whole eye thing) was me trying to perceive what the fuck you were thinking. One minute I would think that you liked me but then the next I would think that you thought all that I was a facade and behind it all there was in actuality nothing (of respect); to which you reveled in knowing that I was but a fraud. I'm exaggerating but needless to say I had no idea what you thought and after a while I just didn't fucking care because I basically thought you were insane (and I know who I am and I am increasingly resilient to not caring what other people think of me). I I left it because relations between the two of us normally were fine. There wasn't anything that affected our relationship as friends or as 'professional colleagues'. Beyond that, whatever else that was going on in your head just didn't feel worth the effort of trying to figure out or perhaps more appropriately it didn't feel worth the effort because it seemed like literally like an unsolvable riddle. I apologize for not being more forward in communicating this sense of confusion. You seem like a smart girl so I felt like you must be semi cognizant that you were giving me messages that were all over the board. So, as it turns out it is all just your sense of my humour and my poor sense of humour as you like to think just wasn't able to interpret or pick up on that humour. Anyway....


So...I don't really want all this to interfere what we do have. To be clear, no, I don't want to make out. But I do want to hang out. You're great and I think you know this. Know it better than ever.


=> When would work for you to go check out this Thoreau Centre this coming week?

all the best,

Xxxxx

Because you look like a complete air head and sometimes it's refreshing to just look into a pair of doozy eyes and admire sun-kissed curls, instead of redefining sovereignty, governing a melting Arctic or moving towards a reappraisal of economic thinking.

Because we would like to go camping and fill the summer with sporty activities such as skinny dipping, tennis and mini-golf. And because bearded beauties like you should not be allowed not to smile at all of life's wonder.

Because now we know never again to ask DJs to play "something you can dance to", but we can't help the fact that blue-eyed sweethearts like you makes us fall in love faster than a three minute song, even if the soundtrack is too slow to shake our bodies to.

Because having friends who are called Greek gods by secret admirers, and who attorneys think look French, makes us very proud. And because you are the tallest, kindest, most intellectual and beautiful youngster we know.

Because we love the causual unbottoned shirt, the books and the beard.

Because we love waking up and find several missed calls from old male acquaintances. It makes us rather suprised though if it is 5 calls and 3 messages from a man whom we met last fall and when last we were in touch around Christmas, he said that he had made a resolution not to drink during all of 2011 and wished me the best of times. The first message was quite plain "We're having an after party, you should come. Come!" The second one said "Fuck Ernst & Young. You can do so much better than that" (We do not work at Ernst & Young.) And the last one: "I know you like to talk politics. I know you like politics. I do not like politics. But maybe we can meet halfway? Ok? Call me."

The optimist is convinced that this guy has not been drinking for half a year and once the alcohol starts kicking in, he builds up the courage to call the girl he has been thinking about for the past six months. The realist in us is quite certain that he is mixing us up with someone else, who works at Ernst & Young, or likes to talk extensively about politics.

So, naturally, we call him up to hear what this is all about, and yes, of course he wanted to talk to us. Slightly ashamed of not keeping his promise of sobriety, he was quite sweet and we ended saying that we would be in touch later on.

Later that week, I texted to know what he was up to, without getting a reply.

Then we wake up at out country house yesterday morning, with six new missed calls from the same dude, all dialed between 06:22 and 06:35 am. This time there is only one voice mail "Hi Emma (that's not our name). I'm willing to go home to you now. Call me."

Not romance in it's most rose scented or star gazing way. To be fair, the timing could have been better since he caught us at point in time when we are slightly tired of this sort of thing, but come on. Then around lunch he gives us a call to apologize, said that it's the hard liquor that drives you mad and am I married? Because he sense that I am a kind, relaxed and a very unusual girl that he would like to know better. Well, we'll see.

Because our boss describes the global financial system as a Shakespearian drama, where the focus on short term instability creates a conflict, which then hints at a solution (Romeo meets Juliet) in a return to its original function of allocating resources over time (insurance) and to those in need (the poor).

And because beardos who are into current affairs makes or hearts and minds high five each other.

We bumped into one of our long-time favorites this past weekend and he looked sharp in a fake Versace blazer and striped shirt. He was so handsome and nice that we decided on the novel approach of asking him out for a beer or a lunch at Grands veranda. Our treat. As working girls you ought to spend your money wisely on romantic meals and booze.

Although he is the most amusing and provoking person we know, he rarely surprises us. Needless to say, the invitation did not get a reply and we had to inform him how utterly rude that is and ask the open ended question - How will anything ever happen in the history of the world if antagonist never meet?

Because what we really want is one of the world's best people, whose physical appearence might not entirely correspond to that of Marlon Brando, but more importantly, get reviews like; "Nils! You're awesome... never seen a party animal like you before, my eyes were awakened! Thanks for sharing your free spirit!".

Because you look like you've been busy sailing the seven seas, acquiring a huge pile of stories and kindness that you only share with people who you actually find worthy of your attention. And who enjoy salty air, grilled sea bass and star gazing the way you do.

Because the outdoor swimming season has started, making our hearts very light and draws an significant amount of attention away from boys to physical pleasures of sportier character. Or that's not completely true. We simply enjoy the semi-dressed company of boys who prefer to start off their days with a few turqoise laps even more.

Because our boss say wonderful things like; "My bullshit flows more freely in the afternoon" and has a desk decorated with signs such as; "Things are getting worse, send more chocolate". And we love that, nearly as much as we would like to hang out and bs with bad boy teenager Woody Harrelson.

We roamed through grandpa's old library and found a tiny book called Ord på Vägen. A completely, to us, unknown Jakob Billström spelled out what we know, adore and find most frustrating when it come to love;

"Kärleken skall vara en gåva av en annans fria och för den själv likväl oemåtståndliga vilja. Den kärlek man erhåller av medlidande, efter böner, efter hot eller gräl ... vad värde har egentligen den? En kärlek som byggs på rättigheter är ingen kärlek."

Vi kan erövra det mesta vi åtrår utom ett: den äkta kärleken. Den är suveränt fri, går obönhörligt sina egna vägar. Hur vi än åstundar den - är det inte bättre att avstå hur det än svider, om den inte är helt frivillig? I kärleken måste givandets och tagandets vågskålar väga jämnt.

Because when we told our boss we thought it would be a good idea to corporatize social and environmental problems (bolagisera samhällsproblemen), he looked at us in that same doubtful way. Only so that when you do it, it's very attractive.

Because on the first day of our three-months-office-life experiment, we realized that the best thing about work is the weekly fruit basket and Friday afternoon drinks.

- På grund av bristande engagemang kommer vi tyvärr att lägga ner Omar's fan club. De stigande frimärkskostnaderna står inte i relation till mitt otillfredställda hångelbehov.
Hoppas du samtycker.

- Deal.
- Tack för de fina breven och nyquilsen.

- Nöjet var helt på min sida. X

"You've achieved success in your field when you don't know whether what you're doing is work or play," and "Marriage requires a special talent, like acting. Monogamy requires genius" are two quotes by Warren Beatty. And if you find the internet a reliable source of information, he is also cited saying that; "My notion of a wife at 40 is that a man should be able to change her, like a bank note, for two 20s."

Clearly, a black sheep lacking both genius, work and play, but still a fairly good explanation as to why he is looking so sharp in dark wool.

Because nothing quenches the thirst on a sweaty beach day as ice-cold coke with lemon, drunk through a straw, with sleeves rolled up and ray-bans on.

Because the great thing about native languages is that words
sometime ring much truer in it than others. And really,
romance is all about a mutual desire to see each other.

Får jag träffa dig ikväll?
Jag har ingen anledning till det
Tänkte först gå runt det, tänkte råka springa på dig

Men nu är är det bara så
Att jag orkar inte göra så
Antingen vill du träffa mig eller så vill du det inte

Vill du det inte så går jag nog hel ut ur det
När man var liten föll man jämt
Men nu ska det vara så jävla hemskt

Så fastän du kanske säger ja bara för att vara snäll
Får jag träffa dig ikväll?

Får jag gå precis så nära
Att min axel stryker vid din arm
Jag vill inte verka jobbig eller så men jag är varm
Och du ser kall ut 


Lyrics from the song Får jag? by Säkert!

Because you look like a guy who we would like to have living in one of our cupboards. We met him today and he was unusually, exceptionally nice, in addition to having messy hair and being unshaved in a very attractive way. He had to borrow our library card to print something, and maybe that was the only explanation to his civil behaviour . He then introduced himself to our other friend by saying that we are like yin and yang. In his world, that means that we are opposing forces who will never get along.
In our world it means that we complement each other in perfect harmony.

Because we can't remember the last time we saw a man in a tie and a plaid shirt. And because you encompass the very mis-leading notion of the man as a stable, funny, great dad, great lover, hard working and reliable God.

Because everything makes sense when we read that Robert has it's roots in the ancient Germanic name Hrodebert, a composition of honour (hrode) and light or shining (bert).
Our minds instantly think knight in shining armour, or simply, shiny, happy good times.

Because you obviously know that every other, third or fourth drink should be a glass of water.

Liljeholmsbron heter den. Perfekt gråtbro. Very scenic. Det är nog det jag hatar mest med stockholm, denna känsla att tvinga på andra sin kärlek. Känns sjukt ovärdigt och missförstått. Du är fantastiskt fin. Hoppas du drömmer sött. X

/-/
Hoppas du fick känna dig lite extra speciell igår. Uppvaktningen ska hädanefter vara av mindre störig karaktär.

:-)
Är du ledig idag?

Har du en cykel?

Ja jag har en cykel.
Vi kan ligga istället för att cykla.

Jag visste inte om du ville ses påklädd eller avklädd. Men i så fall får du gärna komma till Östermalm sen.

Med eller utan kläder?

De går väl att ta av?

Because you are R4, and the Greatest Brit we know.

Because dudes who so obviously part-time as models possess such clean cut good-lookingness that it makes most of the IKEA catalogue look messy.

Because you land perfectly in the grey zone between being a secret agent and a cast member from Singing in the rain. And because happy eyes is the most attractive thing we know.

Because out there on the waves you seem charismatic, agreeable and adaptable and you can adapt to just about any social situation, convincing others you are just like them. And with your flexibility, liberal attitude and lack of prejudice, you can find something interesting in just about anyone. But when your interest wanes, you depart; you cannot tolerate boredom. As an Explorer you like knowledge, adventure and the pleasures of the senses, and you are drawn to those who are enthusiastic, curious, creative and energetic-people like yourself. Sex is important to you, too. As a Negotiator, you have a big heart; you are flexible and sensitive to the feelings of others and you are driven to seek harmony in your social life. So you avoid conflict, as well as people who compete with you. You also avoid those who structure your time and block things from happening spontaneously. And you can feel pressured by other's needs. So you are attracted to individuals who share your "live and let live" attitude. Money is secondary to you, so you also respect individuals who can part with theirs, particularly when spending leads to adventure or improves the world. And you are drawn to people who are direct, decisive and tough minded to balance out your flexible, spontaneous, intuitive style.

Because it seems you just sat down in a photo booth to relax after a long lunch of cheese and wine, or maybe moules marinière, and while the busy streets of Paris roam about outside, the single lock of curl in your forehead makes the whispery sound of a flat b.

Because you are so very attractive, simply by being incredibly light-blue, laid-back, having kind eyes, bony fingers, dimples and the best seven letters in the world printed over your chest.

Because we love men, and when they don't respond to our telecom-based text messages, we send them poems via regular mail instead. And because we believe that the digital world sometime lack the mental clarity and pureness of heart that comes with analog communication.

Because your hair would make any black stallion jealous and a galactic shaman is borrowing our apartment, which makes your t-shirt and our pleasant cosmic energy a match made in the outer stratosphere.

Because you look classy in a reversed sports cap, seem to know how to drop a beat and certainly possess a few Justin-moves. And although Mr. Timberlake isn't one of our favourites, he does speak to our hearts;
"I wanna be your sky,
so blue and high,
and every time you think of me,
I wanna blow your mind",
or an even more striking all-round philosophy;
"I just want to enjoy my life and show this world how to care".

Because spring sunshine is followed by summer sun and swimming. And because standing on that yatch makes you look like a modern day Baron, similar to our new discovery Edward Bulwer-Lytton. First Baron Lytton, who not only coined the utterly romantic opening line; "It was a dark and stormy night" but also wrote the one-and-only manual to success; "Nothing is so contagious as enthusiasm... it is the genius of sincerity, and truth accomplishes no victories without it."

In fact, it comes to this: nobody is capable of really thinking about anyone, even in the worst calamity. For really thinking about that person every minute of the day, without letting one's thoughts be diverted by anything, by meals, by a fly that settles on one's cheek, by household duties, or by a sudden itch somewhere. But there are always flies and itches. That's why it is difficult to live.

We ususally find life pretty easy, but Albert Camus has a point in The Plague. Not that living is hard, but about brain capacity. Although certain persons tend to move into our brain, with age and by acquiring other passions, we've become better at diverting the mind towards trees, entrepreneurial dinosaurs and the importance of play. To blend out with the boy-think.

Because for some reason you makes us think of a younger, European Julian Casablancas. And after seeing Somewhere, the song I'll try anything once again reminds of us the genius of those New York boys and the simple beauty of well chosen words;

When I said; 'I can see me in your eyes',
you said; 'I can see you in my bed'.
That's not just friendship that's romance too,
you like music we can dance to.

Because, right now we are thinking about a boy to whom we have given the imaginary Native American name of Skinny Bear, who had us at "sluta larva dig" and what we really look forward to is the next time he will look into our eyes and smile.

And although we like the unity of smiles and beards and men and lips, we completely agree with Gandhi's overarching policy; "Throughout my life, all my activities have been motivated by the single objective of uniting hearts."

New man of our dreams Dallas Clayton does not only have the best first name and a boyish grace that melts our hearts. He is also a cosmic twin in the universe of optimism, very handsome, draws magically, speaks wisely, loves strangers, hangs out with kids and is the founder of A Very Awesome World (which is like this world, but even better.)

He is very much living the dream and; "If you ever have any doubts about whether or not you should do something totally new even though you have no blue print whatsoever and there is every possibility that you could fail completely, the answer is 100% YES!"

And, of course, he writes poetry;
NEW LOVE

Find something new today
to love and enjoy
like the rest of those familiar loves
that have topped your list for years.

It doesn’t have to come close
and likely it won’t
but it might
and if it did
boy, that’d sure make this a day to remember-
the day you set about
turning over rocks
and shaking the neighborhood trees
only to discover
exactly what it was
you didn’t even know you were looking for.

As if that wasn't enough, we have one of our slightly messed-up beardo favourites reading An Awesome Book aloud for our loving ears.

Because all kisses ought to be beautiful and spiritual, and because We feel fine.